MPs have until midnight on Wednesday to register any expenses they expect to incur from working on a Saturday, says the Office of Parliamentary Expenses.
Parliament will meet on Saturday 19th October for a decisive vote on the location of the metaphorical ditch in which Boris Johnson’s career should be found to have expired.
Parliamentarians, who will have already worked for four days this week, say the request to submit claims for Saturday working by midnight is pushing them to the limit.
“This is a clear abuse of power by remainers in the Office of Parliamentary Expenses,” Eugene Jackson-Southfield, Conservative MP for Lower Nodealshire, told us.
“How can I be expected to make up the expenses I’ll need to claim for the weekend now? There are just too many variables. I’ve already had to cancel a lunch just to get it done.
“For instance, I may have to stay at the Dorchester if the debate drags on into the afternoon.
“My cleaner comes on a Saturday, so I can’t be expected to stay at my ministerial flat, and I’ve already told my mistress I’ll be in town.
“Then there’s my food. I can’t choose if I want to dine at Le Gavroche or Hélène Darroze at The Connaught on a Wednesday? Come Saturday night I may fancy sushi at Umu, then what would happen?”
The House of Commons has only sat on four Saturdays since 1939, including once in 1980 to debate the shooting of J. R. Ewing.
Margaret Thatcher correctly predicted that Kristin Shepard was the shooter, defeating an opposition motion for Miss Ellie by 52 votes.