Car drivers are being warned of long delays on roads everywhere as everyone in the country will attempt to drive somewhere at the same time this weekend.
Congestion is expected as Brits enjoying the bank holiday weekend attempt to drive from one part of the country to a slightly different part of the country all at the same time.
Bank holiday travel expert George Fishlove advises people with cars not to even bother loading the roof rack and strapping the kids screens to the back of the seats.
He suggests that most people would be better off either staying home and drinking or just going to work as usual.
“Well it’s a bank holiday and science tells us that two things will happen,” Mr Fishlove says.
“Firstly it will rain just as you’ve wrestled the BBQ out of the shed and dusted all the dead mice off it, secondly the country’s transport infrastructure will grind to a halt by 16:32 on Friday afternoon.
“My advice to people who want to get somewhere over the bank holiday weekend is that they should wait until Tuesday or Wednesday at least before setting off on their journey.”
While congestion chaos on the roads is likely to be the lead story on news bulletins throughout the weekend, rail travellers can also expect to enjoy their precious day off sat in a hot metal box going nowhere.
All major rail routes will be closed to allow men in orange high visibility jackets to stand around in the sun earning double pay, leaving many travellers stranded on replacement bus services, which will also be stuck in bank holiday traffic.