The Post Truth Post

Corbyn hails Brussels shopping trip a success

Jeremy Corbyn
Photo credit: DepositPhotos

Jeremy Corbyn is back in the UK this morning after a whistle-stop, pre-Brexit shopping trip to Brussels.

The Labour leader was accompanied by, shadow Brexit secretary, Sir Keir Starmer on the 18-hour round trip to Brussels yesterday, returning with a van load of continental cheeses, jams and Belgian beer. 

Arriving back in Islington this morning, Mr Corbyn addressed the press from his shed hailing the trip as a monumental success. 

“Like many of my constituents, I haven’t got a clue what’s going on with Brexit. If I’m honest I thought the Tories would eventually see sense and call the whole thing off”, Corbyn told reporters.

“When I saw Theresa on TV on Wednesday night, with that mad glint in her eye, I just said to myself she’s flipped, she’s going to let us crash out and I panicked.

SUBMIT YOUR ORIGINAL SPOOF NEWS
ARTICLE TO THE POST TRUTH POST

“I put my tin of beans back in the fridge and got straight on the phone to Keir and told him she’s gone crazy, we have to act now. 

“To be fair it was Keir who suggested hiring the van and heading to Brussels to stock up on beers before the WTO tariffs kick in; smart boy that one.

“Anyway, I can say it was a very productive trip. Keir came home with two hundred different Trappist beers and I’ve stocked the larder with some delightful jams and cheeses.

“Did you know the Belgians make a jam from evaporated fruit juices called Sirop de Liège? It really is rather lovely, I guess I’ll miss that once we’ve Brexited.”

NEXT ARTICLE

About Us