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Suspicious package discovered in PM’s office identified as Irish backstop agreement

backstop agreement

Officials say a suspicious package discovered in Theresa May's office, with an Irish postmark and return address, has been identified as a harmless copy of the Irish backstop agreement.

Westminster was on lockdown this afternoon after a suspect package with an Irish postmark was delivered to the Prime Minister’s office.

The package was similar in appearance to those delivered to Waterloo Station, Heathrow Airport and London City Airport yesterday, which were later discovered to contain incendiary devices. 

Fortunately, Chris Grayling was attending PMQs so emergency services were already on hand as a precaution following yesterday’s kitchen fire.

Bomb disposal experts attended the scene, opening the package using a remote-controlled robot, to discover that it was the latest draft of the Irish backstop agreement, sent by the Oireachtas Éireann for Mrs May’s approval.

Police say the document is harmless to the public and poses no threat to MPs, a view that was immediately contested by the European Research Group. 

The ERG leader, Jacob Rees-Mogg, has called for a full investigation and destruction of any further copies of the backstop agreement that are discovered.

Contradicting the bomb disposal team Mr Rees-Mogg called the document a “significant threat to the country and highly incendiary.”


COBRA meeting called as Chris Grayling makes pancakes for Cabinet

Fire Fighters
Photo credit: Pixels

Theresa May convened the UK’s emergency response committee this afternoon after Chris Grayling destroyed the House of Commons kitchens while making pancakes.

Grayling is understood to have offered to make pancakes for his Cabinet colleagues in an attempt to win favour following his numerous recent public gaffs.

The Secretary of State for Transport was spotted entering kitchens located under the Palace of Westminster with an ASDA bag full of pancake ingredients, including a large quantity of potentially flammable lard. 

The Prime Minister immediately called an emergency COBRA meeting when thick black smoke from the kitchens started to fill the building and emergency services attended the scene.

Mr Grayling was uninjured in the incident but will be taking some time off from ministerial duties to recover from the shock and for the good of the country as a whole.