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European Union to offer 2-4-1 Brexit deals in exclusive Black Friday event.

Black Friday Sale
Photo credit: Elisa Riva

Less than 24 hours after Theresa May triumphantly announced that she’d wrestled a bargain Brexit deal from the hands of Michel Barnier, the EU has revealed it intends to offer two for one Brexit deals in an exclusive Black Friday event.

Black Friday, traditionally the day Americans work off the Thanksgiving calories by brawling in the aisles of the their local Walmart, has gained popularity in Europe in recent years but political observers and Groupon users alike didn’t see this latest twist in the EU’s negotiation strategy.

“The government has spent nearly two years negotiating a Brexit deal that literally no one is happy with, even those that have bothered to read it”, said avid coupon clipper Jane Fishlove.

“Now Brussels are practically giving them away to any politician who’s prepared to queue overnight outside the European Council Offices and offer a swift elbow to the face of anyone that gets in their way when the doors open.

”It’s a shame David Davis quit really, this is the sort of negotiation he’d be good at”.

Asked if he’d also be taking advantage of Black Friday, Jacob Rees-Mogg is quoted as saying; “I’m not sure I know the fellow. Is he from the colonies?”

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